Building Godly Relationships
What does it mean to be soul ties?
The definition is a spiritual connection or bond between two people. People who come into your life affect you on a spiritual, emotional, physical, and social level. A physical tie is the most common bond that people experience in their lifetime.
Healthy soul ties improve one’s life and overall well-being because they vibrate love, strength, and positivity. Ungodly soul ties, on the other hand, negatively affect one or both of the people that share the bond. Unhealthy soul ties are usually a product of sinful acts such as harassment or rape. In the demonic world, unholy soul ties can serve as bridges between two people to pass demonic garbage through one person to another. Sarah was able to break free of visitations from demons from an ungodly soul tie after an intimate relationship with her boyfriend. Even though she was a Christian, unknowingly, the enemy had permission to send demonic torment because a door had been opened through a physical relationship that formed an unhealthy soul tie.
In the Bible, it doesn’t use the word soul tie, but it talks about souls being knit together becoming one flesh. A soul tie can serve many functions, but in its simplest form, it ties two souls together in the spiritual realm. Soul ties between married couples draw them together like magnets, while soul ties between fornicators can draw a beaten and abused woman to the man which in the natural realm she would hate and run from, but instead, she runs to him even though he doesn’t love her, and treats her like dirt. Also, soul ties can allow one person to manipulate and control another person, and the other person is unaware to what is going on, or knows what is going on, but for no real reason, allows it to continue.
Signs of an Unhealthy Soul Tie:
- Irrational thinking – how they act and what they do does not make sense. For example, the family is saved, the wife’s classmates show up, go party, they sow seeds in her life of discontentment. A soul tie is formed; ie, she feels unappreciated, husband doesn’t show love, children are weighing her down. Irrational thinking has put a spell on her. She believes she is a Madonna and that other men will appreciate her more. Everyone else can see it won’t work.
- Evaluate self and others according to a previous context – a remarried couple tells his wife he has to work late; her thoughts go back to first marriage which she later found out he was cheating on her. She waits at the door with a frying pan thinking her husband might be doing the same. Any flashbacks of previous hurts reveal unhealthy soul tie. You cannot judge past by present.
- Shut down emotionally – you cannot give what you do not have. You must be in charge of your own soul. If not, you won’t talk and tell how you feel. Husbands will sit down in front of TV and turn wife off. Any wife would feel isolated and lonely. Husband cannot release his soul if he does not possess his soul. To feel a void, wives become shop-o-holics, they seek another source of happiness. They have no time for each other.
- Unhealthy desire attracted to like people, places and events – these result in an individual’s detriment. The goal of the enemy is to bring havoc in your life. People demonically influenced will be attracted to things that hurt them. Friends always hurt them. They are bound on the inside and needy. There is nothing on the inside to give them self-authority and determination.
- Lack of judgment and discernment – confusion on person causes one to make irrational decisions. They will say, “He hits me but I know he loves me.” Others will be able to see, but confused individual will not be able to see truth.
- Inability to establish and keep proper adult relationships – These people are like a large child in their development. All goofy and giddy, insecure and needy. “Do you still love me; answer yes or no”. Dining with a friend, “Are you mad at me? Circle yes or no”. They will wear you out.
Unhealthy Soul Tie is a counterfeit covenant relationship:
- Birth – everyone is linked in their soul to those in their family. Unhealthy ones will cause you to dread family reunions; ie, Aunt Martha’s attitude, Uncle Barry’s boastfulness. Don’t allow their attitudes to influence you, pray for them, love them but don’t compromise.
- Marriage – Ge. 2:23,24 “Bone of my bone…cleave as one flesh.” In-laws are not to control. If divorced, legally bound in the soulish realm and it must be broken. People who have many past relationships find it very difficult to ‘bond’ or be joined to anybody, because their soul is fragmented.
- Sexual activity – I Cor. 6:15,” Know ye not that your bodies are the members of Christ? Shall I take the members of Christ and make them the members of a harlot? God forbid.” Ge. 34:2,3 Dinah was raped and her soul cleaved to him. There was transference of spirits, a swapping of demons and you can’t get the victory until freedom.
- Listening to wrong people – You can hear, but do not open your spirit up. College students in philosophy class must keep the voice on the outside of them. Don’t allow the wrong voice to change your thinking or identify with it.
- Allegiance – gang network pledges their allegiances. They think the gang will take care of them, but there’s no future; there’s no life. You never see old gangs taking care of each other.
- Idolization – The American culture can cause us to look to others to fulfill a need. Hollywood has projected desires on people and bind their life even if they never met anyone. It affects the emotions and leave room in the soul.
- Vows, commitments and agreements: Vows are known to bind the soul (Numbers 30:2), marriage itself consists of vows and binds the two people together (Ephesians 5:31), there is little reason to overlook the concept of vows or commitments as being a means to create a soul tie.
How to break a Soul Tie:
- If any sins were committed to cause this soul tie, repent of them! Fornication is perhaps one of the most common ways to create nasty soul ties.
- If gifts were given to you by the other person in connection with the sin or unholy relationship, such as rings, flowers, cards, bras, etc. get rid of them! Such things symbolize the ungodly relationship, and can hold a soul tie in place. Don’t hang on to such things that symbolize sin or that are wrong to give each other before marriage.
- Any rash vows or commitments made that played a part in forming the soul tie should be renounced and repented of, and broken in Jesus’ name. Even things like “I will love you forever”, or “I could never love another man!” need to be renounced. They are spoken commitments that need to be undone verbally.
- Forgive that person if you have anything against them. Do this verbally, and in Jesus’ name. Example, “Father, I ask that you forgive me for any unholy soul tie. In Jesus’ name, I now repent for any ungodly soul ties formed between myself and ______ as a result of _______________ (fornication, etc.).”
- Break and reject the soul tie in Jesus’ name. Renounce the ungodly soul tie and command it to go in Jesus Name! Do this verbally using your authority in Jesus Name. Example, “I now break and sever any ungodly soul ties formed between myself and _________ as a result of ______________ (fornication, etc.) in Jesus’ name.”
- Call your soul back to wholeness! Father, according to Ps. 23:4 “I call restoration in my emotions, intellect, will and desire & decree wholeness in my soul. Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer. My desire is to have healthy relationships and to serve you wholeheartedly in Jesus Name.”